Saturday, July 4, 2015

Facebook: Messy Friend?!?!



A few days ago, a couple, solicited my advice about a dispute they were having


Is Venting Your Problems and/or Feelings on Facebook
Ok or Not?

When I think of Facebook I often say, “Facebook is the devil.”  Don’t get me wrong I believe it is a great platform to market yourself, connect with long lost loved ones, and stay current on people’s life updates.  However, it is also a platform that can cause rifts in friendships, drama between people who hardly know each other, and break up relationships.  There have been several times I have seen people write, “if you don’t like what I say, then don’t look at it or delete me.”  Or many people say they “don’t care what others think of them.”  Personally, I believe these are comments of immaturity.  Mature people are definitely not consumed with people’s view of them but they should BE Concerned.  Social Media is PUBLIC, which means that any one and everyone whether friend, follower, or foe can view what you say and interpret with their own perspective.  Therefore, it is very important to use these mediums of free speech Responsibly.  I’d like to say before venting your temporary emotions or subliminal messages about a co-worker, partner, friend, acquaintance, or even enemy about private situations that you chose not to say directly to them.  (P.S. Even when you don’t use names, people always know who the comments are about).

Take the time to  Think
Facebook is like a “messy” friend, who will always share your information with anyone and everyone willing to listen.

Having an opinion about someone’s actions, clothes, issues, character, or otherwise is okay and only becomes a PROBLEM when the person becomes aware of your feelings toward them.  I have been offended and played the role of offender of sharing opinions that would have been better kept to myself or just to private conversation.  Once information gets into the hands of the wrong person “Ms. Messy Boots” it can cause unwelcomed, unpredicted, unsolicited reactions from others that may be irreparable and once that information is overheard or it’s said in writing you can’t take it back and intentions become irrelevant, no longer important, and may not even be received by targeted party. 

TIPS
·      Be careful what you say and the medium you choose to say it. 
·      Take a 5-10 minute PAUSE before speaking or telling Facebook your inner thoughts

CONSIDER in a non-overly-emotional-mind
·      If the person heard this information, am I willing to deal with consequences?
·      What is the worst that could happen?
·      If that worse happens, was that my intention when writing this comment?

Please note that I did say, “non-overly-emotional-mind” which means don’t be so “caught in your feelings” that you can’t think straight.  A level of maturity is seen in a person who is able to rationally consider using their emotions and logic to come to a decision of action and not just go with their emotional mind of anger, sadness, disappointment, and etc. to inform their behavior.   

Word of Advice: For those who Always think a comment is about you,
Either Change Your Circle of “messy” or Get A Life,
Not ALL comments or post are regarding you, especially not repost that resonate with the person.  Ultimately, no one is ever that important.


I know it’s WORK and it’s easier to continue to do the same thing over and over again because you and Drama have become such close friends over the years, but break yourself from this friend and introduce yourself to some new friends named Peace, Hope, and Success. Nobody said it would be easy, but God hasn’t brought you this far to LEAVE you. Remember to ask for HIS Guidance in beginning this process. I am here for you too and I’m willing to answer any questions you may have about what hinders your ability to make progress in this area.

Catch the next APP to Download for your life
on the World Hit Gospel Show on 106 KMEL or iHeart radio with
Tinka, Bishop Keith Clark, and Dr. Rosché
at 6 am—10am on Sunday Mornings.

Dr. Rosché

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